Last Tuesday morning, on my way to work, still under cover of darkness and some significant fog, one of those souped-up billy goats (American White-Tailed Deer) decided to make use of the opportunity of my vehicle for his grand effort of committing suicide. He was hiding out in someone's driveway under cover of a yard border of juniper trees. As I got to his position, he leaped forth and tagged me right ahead of my left rear wheel. His work was successful. It stopped his breathing and his heart. I filed a claim under my comprehensive insurance policy.
Wednesday, I delivered to Young Ford in Charlotte and Fort Mill Ford, just across the state line. I got home early. A few chores to do around the house, then I took the deer-damaged truck to a friend that operates an auto body repair shop for a discussion about the damage. Upon returning home, I decided that I should make use of another vehicle to get to work Thursday morning, as an insurance adjuster was due to make a visit and have a look at this one. This other one was out of gas, so I went up the street to fill it up. I had the nozzle in the tank ready to pump, and reached back to my rear to pull out my wallet. The pocket was empty!
I went back and retraced all my steps from the time I got home, in frantic search. No luck. I was sick with worry all night. I searched until I had exhausted what I thought was every possible location and then took it further. I returned to the workplace with a flashlight and searched the BUTT. Again, I was in vain and dejectedly drove home. I thought the only option I had remaining was to return to where I delivered Wednesday. I got to Charlotte before sunrise. Strike One! Just after light, I got to Fort Mill. Strike Two! The guys at Fort Mill helped me look around. I then went back to Charlotte and employees there assisted. All the drive back I could only think about having to have cards canceled and getting duplicates of them and a duplicate driver's license and DOT medical card. The company I work for had a stake in this too. Motel corporate guest card and cash advance, fuel cards were in that wallet.
Upon my arrival at our terminal, I went directly to the BUTT and searched once again with the benefit of daylight. No dice!
Strike Three! As I walked away, the thought hit me to take a look under the cab...just in case. Shit! Not there.Facind the front bumper about ten feet out ahead of it, as I stood back up...Holy Shiite! Lo and behold, there atop the front step bumper...
! That damned thing had obviously ridden in that spot for...I don't know. I don't care. I've found it!In reflection, in order to untie the Ford Explorer that was above the cab of the truck, I had to lay on the hood to reach the chains. When I slid off and to the bumper, it must have exited my back pocket and landed on the bumper. Then, as I turned to secure the chain for travel, my toe must have pushed it under the grille of the hood without my being aware it was out. Most amazing, it rode there all the way back to Walkertown from Fort Mill, SC. Due to ongoing construction on I85, I chose to return via I77 and I40. For any of you that have had the pleasure
of traveling I77 just south of Statesville, you know exactly what an unsmooth ride that can be. That chunk of leather withstood all that bouncing and wind. I'm glad I have a guardian angel, even if he does have to wear a suit of armor. Anyone else have story of loss return to rival this one? My brother once had to use the services of a pyschic to find a lost ring. It worked.
Ooooh, shit. I quickly realized that I had left it on the roof of the car when I'd finished writing the note. 
I pulled over to the side of the access ramp, got out and looked on the roof of the car, but it wasn't there. I got back in the car, got on I-40 to the next exit, turned around and went back to exit 138 and back to Zinc, looking on the roadside for my notebook. Just before I got to the Zinc driveway, there it was on the edge of the road where it landed after sliding off the car's roof! 
No one had driven over it, the road was dry so it wasn't wet, and none of the pages had torn out! Whew! 
I was very glad and realized how lucky I was a) to realize so quickly how dumb I'd been leaving it on the roof and b) that it was found unscathed! 
This was the one and only falsehood I would tell a customer, but essential for having their number. The exchange of the caller's number was at least 95% positive. 
That's the best part of the story.