Sh*t My Dad Says...

[shereec]

y'all are hilarious!

[Miles]

I remember one of the coolest, and scariest, things I saw my dad do was put my brother in his place. There weren't many problems with my brother and I growing up. We were good kids, made plenty of mistakes and had our fair share of screwups, but we both loved and respected our parents and we had a happy family. I don't know what happened but one day when we were in high school my brother had a bug up his ass about something and he let my mother know it. It hurt her feelings pretty bad and my dad let my brother know he wasn't thrilled with his behavior, and Jonathon said some typical, badass teenage crap like "whatever, she's my mom" and my dad raised his eyebrow, leaned into Jonathon's face and said "She may be your mother, but she's my wife and nobody talks to my wife that way."

HOLY CRAP I almost died. It was awesome and I had never seen my brother so humbled. Great thing about having a big brother is he'll make mistakes for you, all you have to do is pay attention. I never made that same mistake.

On a sidenote, Jonathon got to use the same technique a few years ago when his son started getting too big for his britches. Way to go Dads!

[CathyCA]

I remember one of the coolest, and scariest, things I saw my dad do was put my brother in his place. There weren't many problems with my brother and I growing up. We were good kids, made plenty of mistakes and had our fair share of screwups, but we both loved and respected our parents and we had a happy family. I don't know what happened but one day when we were in high school my brother had a bug up his ass about something and he let my mother know it. It hurt her feelings pretty bad and my dad let my brother know he wasn't thrilled with his behavior, and Jonathon said some typical, badass teenage crap like "whatever, she's my mom" and my dad raised his eyebrow, leaned into Jonathon's face and said "She may be your mother, but she's my wife and nobody talks to my wife that way."

HOLY CRAP I almost died. It was awesome and I had never seen my brother so humbled. Great thing about having a big brother is he'll make mistakes for you, all you have to do is pay attention. I never made that same mistake.

On a sidenote, Jonathon got to use the same technique a few years ago when his son started getting too big for his britches. Way to go Dads!

Way to go, Dad! Your dad taught you and your brother in a way that neither of you will ever forget to respect women.

[DukieInKansas]

I remember one of the coolest, and scariest, things I saw my dad do was put my brother in his place. There weren't many problems with my brother and I growing up. We were good kids, made plenty of mistakes and had our fair share of screwups, but we both loved and respected our parents and we had a happy family. I don't know what happened but one day when we were in high school my brother had a bug up his ass about something and he let my mother know it. It hurt her feelings pretty bad and my dad let my brother know he wasn't thrilled with his behavior, and Jonathon said some typical, badass teenage crap like "whatever, she's my mom" and my dad raised his eyebrow, leaned into Jonathon's face and said "She may be your mother, but she's my wife and nobody talks to my wife that way."

HOLY CRAP I almost died. It was awesome and I had never seen my brother so humbled. Great thing about having a big brother is he'll make mistakes for you, all you have to do is pay attention. I never made that same mistake.

On a sidenote, Jonathon got to use the same technique a few years ago when his son started getting too big for his britches. Way to go Dads!

Great response by your Dad!


One of my favorite lines from my Dad - "No sense going down a dirt road." It wasn't always used when a dirt road was visible and no one remembers the first time it was used.

[Ima Facultiwyfe]

I remember one of the coolest, and scariest, things I saw my dad do was put my brother in his place. There weren't many problems with my brother and I growing up. We were good kids, made plenty of mistakes and had our fair share of screwups, but we both loved and respected our parents and we had a happy family. I don't know what happened but one day when we were in high school my brother had a bug up his ass about something and he let my mother know it. It hurt her feelings pretty bad and my dad let my brother know he wasn't thrilled with his behavior, and Jonathon said some typical, badass teenage crap like "whatever, she's my mom" and my dad raised his eyebrow, leaned into Jonathon's face and said "She may be your mother, but she's my wife and nobody talks to my wife that way."

HOLY CRAP I almost died. It was awesome and I had never seen my brother so humbled. Great thing about having a big brother is he'll make mistakes for you, all you have to do is pay attention. I never made that same mistake.

On a sidenote, Jonathon got to use the same technique a few years ago when his son started getting too big for his britches. Way to go Dads!

Honest and brilliant of him. Bless his heart and yours ... I mean it. If more parents weren't afraid of their own teenagers this would be a much better world.
Love, Ima

[lawgrad91]

I remember one of the coolest, and scariest, things I saw my dad do was put my brother in his place. There weren't many problems with my brother and I growing up. We were good kids, made plenty of mistakes and had our fair share of screwups, but we both loved and respected our parents and we had a happy family. I don't know what happened but one day when we were in high school my brother had a bug up his ass about something and he let my mother know it. It hurt her feelings pretty bad and my dad let my brother know he wasn't thrilled with his behavior, and Jonathon said some typical, badass teenage crap like "whatever, she's my mom" and my dad raised his eyebrow, leaned into Jonathon's face and said "She may be your mother, but she's my wife and nobody talks to my wife that way."

HOLY CRAP I almost died. It was awesome and I had never seen my brother so humbled. Great thing about having a big brother is he'll make mistakes for you, all you have to do is pay attention. I never made that same mistake.

On a sidenote, Jonathon got to use the same technique a few years ago when his son started getting too big for his britches. Way to go Dads!

Honest and brilliant of him. Bless his heart and yours ... I mean it. If more parents weren't afraid of their own teenagers this would be a much better world.
Love, Ima

Amen, Ima. I can't tell you the numbers of kids I see in court who openly sass their parents and grandparents. I don't have a short fuse, but I told one kid once if he told his grandma to "shut up" again in court, I was going to shut him up.

We almost never see parents whose kids respect them, except for speeding tickets and careless wrecks and the like.

[bjornolf]

This was something my wife and I did that was pretty funny, but it originates with her dad:

We were driving home from her parents' house (about 2.5 hours, 150 miles) and I-95 was a complete nightmare, so we took "the scenic route". We're driving down this back road, my wife navigating with the map, when she suddenly hollers "TURN HERE". I almost spun the car out making the turn. Now we were REALLY in the woods. Literally. There was a huge, beautiful canopy of trees completely covering the road like a tunnel. The road had a single yellow line down the middle. After a mile or so, the line disappeared. The foliage was so thick above us I couldn't even see the sky. About thirty seconds later, I started chuckling. My wife said, "What?" And I said, "You're just like your dad. He'd have taken us down this same road, rather than go an extra mile to stay on main highways." She replied, "Nah, he'd have had us on a dirt road." Literally, as she finished speaking, we rounded a corner and DUN-DUN we left the pavement and hit dirt road. We looked at each other and just started laughing our asses off. The timing couldn't have been better if we'd been in a scripted movie. The kids wanted to know what was so funny. That just made us laugh harder. We still get a chuckle when we tell that story.