Southern Women

[CathyCA]

Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.

Southern women know their manners:
'Yes, ma'am.'
'Yes, sir.'
'Why, no, Billy!'

Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions :
'Y'all come back!'
'Well, bless your heart.'
'Drop by when you can.'
'How's your Momma?'

Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity

Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick

Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea with mint

Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah

Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind

Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football

Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's homemade jelly

Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna

Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler

Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon

Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food

More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't 'HAVE' them, you 'PITCH' them.
_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up 'a mess.'
_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of 'yonder.'
_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long 'directly' is, . as in: 'Going to town, be back directly.'
_____

Even Southern babies know that 'Gimme some sugar' is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
_____

All Southerners know exactly when 'by and by' is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
_____

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between 'right near' and 'a right far piece.' They also know that 'just down the road' can be 1 mile or 20.
_____

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
_____

A Southerner knows that 'fixin' can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're in line, we talk to everybody!
_____

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
_____

In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____

When you hear someone say, 'Well, I caught myself lookin', you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____

Only true Southerners say 'sweet tea' and 'sweet milk.' Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. 'Sweet milk' means you don't want buttermilk.
_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, 'Bless her heart' ... and go your own way.
_____

To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
_____
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
_____

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads 'I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could.'


Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !

[bjornolf]

I can relate to many of those, and my wife fits most of them. My children, even the 16 month old, definitely know what "gimme some sugah" means!

[cl15876]

What an attention gett'r!!!! I love it!!!!

[captmojo]

I fully understand each an' every one of them.
I was raised right.

Thanks for sharing.

[bjornolf]

I fully understand each an' every one of them.
I was raised right.

Thanks for sharing.

Oh, I understood all of them. I have relatives (by marriage) that represent each and every one of them. I just meant that not every single one "applies" to me, as in, I don't use all the expressions myself.

My personal favorite, and one I still think is funny in a kind of morbid way, is that when someone dies, they have "family night at the funeral home." I mean, I get visitation. I'm Irish, so I understand about the wake. But there's just something about the phrase "family night at the funeral home" that rubs me backwards. I start picturing zombies having a party or something.

[cl15876]

I fully understand each an' every one of them.
I was raised right.

Thanks for sharing.

I 2nd that!

[wilson]

Born and raised, hope never to leave. Put me in the club, too.

[Shammrog]

Southern
Ladies
Under
Tremendous
Stress

[devildeac]

Southern
Ladies
Under
Tremendous
Stress

I started that thread "a piece" back on CTN...

How's THAT for Suthn lingo from a Yankee carpetbagger?

[cl15876]

Southern
Ladies
Under
Tremendous
Stress

I started that thread "a piece" back on CTN...

How's THAT for Suthn lingo from a Yankee carpetbagger?

[devildeac]

Southern women appreciate their natural assets:
Clean skin.
A winning smile.
That unforgettable Southern drawl.

Southern women know their manners:
'Yes, ma'am.'
'Yes, sir.'
'Why, no, Billy!'

Southern women have a distinct way with fond expressions :
'Y'all come back!'
'Well, bless your heart.'
'Drop by when you can.'
'How's your Momma?'

Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity

Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick

Southern women know the joys of June, July, and August:
Colorful hi-heel sandals
Strapless sun dresses
Iced sweet tea with mint

Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah

Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind

Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football

Southern women know their country breakfasts:
Red-eye gravy
Grits
Eggs
Country ham
Mouth-watering homemade biscuits with momma's homemade jelly

Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna

Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform.
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler

Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon

Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food

More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't 'HAVE' them, you 'PITCH' them.
_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up 'a mess.'
_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of 'yonder.'
_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long 'directly' is, . as in: 'Going to town, be back directly.'
_____

Even Southern babies know that 'Gimme some sugar' is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
_____

All Southerners know exactly when 'by and by' is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
_____

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between 'right near' and 'a right far piece.' They also know that 'just down the road' can be 1 mile or 20.
_____

Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
_____

A Southerner knows that 'fixin' can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're in line, we talk to everybody!
_____

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
_____

In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____

When you hear someone say, 'Well, I caught myself lookin', you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____

Only true Southerners say 'sweet tea' and 'sweet milk.' Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. 'Sweet milk' means you don't want buttermilk.
_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, 'Bless her heart' ... and go your own way.
_____

To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
_____
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language!
_____

And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads 'I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could.'


Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !

GREAT stuff!

Guess that's why I married one. ;)

[Shammrog]

Southern
Ladies
Under
Tremendous
Stress

I started that thread "a piece" back on CTN...

How's THAT for Suthn lingo from a Yankee carpetbagger?

What is CTN again? (Is it TBTSNBN?)

FYI - my wife has a fridge magnet that says this.

[devildeac]

Southern
Ladies
Under
Tremendous
Stress

I started that thread "a piece" back on CTN...

How's THAT for Suthn lingo from a Yankee carpetbagger?

What is CTN again? (Is it TBTSNBN?)

FYI - my wife has a fridge magnet that says this.

Crazie
Talk.
Net
;)


I wonder whether it could also stand for Country Tunes Network on cable TV?

[wilson]

Crazie
Talk.
Net
;)


I wonder whether it could also stand for Country Tunes Network on cable TV?

Could be Crusty Toe Nails.

[Shammrog]

Counting Town-dwelling Neanderthals.

[Shammrog]

Continuing To Nebulize

[Bostondevil]

You could probably put a 100 Bostonians in a room and half of them would be related, but they'd only find out about it if I was there too (or one of the other Southern ladies on this board.) ;)

[Bostondevil]

One former boyfriend, not from the South, became extremely frustrated with the way I gave directions. Apparently I always said something was just down the road.

[wilson]

One former boyfriend, not from the South, became extremely frustrated with the way I gave directions. Apparently I always said something was just down the road.

If you get to the Waffle House (the one on the right), you've gone too far.

[cl15876]

One former boyfriend, not from the South, became extremely frustrated with the way I gave directions. Apparently I always said something was just down the road.

If you get to the Waffle House (the one on the right), you've gone too far.

I am a big landmark kind of guy also! I have a Waffle House between the house and I-95 but it's on the left heading from my house, but there is a new iHOP on the right!