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Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 4:50 pm
by wilson
I know we've already had a conversation like this, but sometimes I think we just dump too much into the LTE.

My brother is currently in the shower, preparing to head to his church for Wednesday night fellowship. My first thought was of thankfulness and relief, because not having him around will help me to get the rest of what I need to do today done in as stress-free a manner as possible. My brother is by far the more organized, methodical one between us, and he's one to power through stuff and finish ASAP, completely stressing himself (and everyone around him) out in the process. I, on the other hand, like to take my time as much as possible, and I tend to approach things with far less furrowed a brow, as it were. With him gone for several hours, I can do things my way while also doing my best to make this as organized as I can (when it comes to organization, I have a legitimate problem...not diagnosed or anything, but I am and always have been incapable of staying very organized without considerable help and/or, ahem, cajoling).
Do y'all know what I'm getting at?

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 4:55 pm
by cl15876
wilson wrote:I know we've already had a conversation like this, but sometimes I think we just dump too much into the LTE.

My brother is currently in the shower, preparing to head to his church for Wednesday night fellowship. My first thought was of thankfulness and relief, because not having him around will help me to get the rest of what I need to do today done in as stress-free a manner as possible. My brother is by far the more organized, methodical one between us, and he's one to power through stuff and finish ASAP, completely stressing himself (and everyone around him) out in the process. I, on the other hand, like to take my time as much as possible, and I tend to approach things with far less furrowed a brow, as it were. With him gone for several hours, I can do things my way while also doing my best to make this as organized as I can (when it comes to organization, I have a legitimate problem...not diagnosed or anything, but I am and always have been incapable of staying very organized without considerable help and/or, ahem, cajoling).
Do y'all know what I'm getting at?
You hate to be nagged about something you know you should be doing but you need to process it and do it in your time and you are a procrastinator? Am I close?

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 4:56 pm
by DukieInKansas
Sibling differencs are always interesting. The three sisters have always said that when we get old, we will probably end up living together. We each have our strengths and weaknesses and figure when we combine ourselves, we will be much better off.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 5:05 pm
by wilson
cl15876 wrote:You hate to be nagged about something you know you should be doing but you need to process it and do it in your time and you are a procrastinator? Am I close?
Pretty darned close. My brother just left the house, but not before offering a series of "suggestions."
:evil: :evil: :evil: ~x( %-( [-( :-h

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 6:08 pm
by captmojo
I breathe. My brother does not.
I could continue with similar comparisons but...no.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 6:18 pm
by cl15876
wilson wrote:
cl15876 wrote:You hate to be nagged about something you know you should be doing but you need to process it and do it in your time and you are a procrastinator? Am I close?
Pretty darned close. My brother just left the house, but not before offering a series of "suggestions."
:evil: :evil: :evil: ~x( %-( [-( :-h
I can relate, brother! I have a sister who loves to tell me what I should be doing!!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) but I still love her when I know she knows how to read between the lines!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) and then she still loves me!!! :-o :-o :-o :D

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 6:51 pm
by wilson
cl15876 wrote: I can relate, brother! I have a sister who loves to tell me what I should be doing!!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) but I still love her when I know she knows how to read between the lines!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) and then she still loves me!!! :-o :-o :-o :D
Every time my brother does this, he prefaces his statement(s) with "May I make a suggestion?", followed by his not-so-subtly snide way of indicating that he believes his manner of doing things to be vastly superior to mine.
I'm always tempted to respond with, "May I make an observation?...I'm a grown ass man."

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 7:06 pm
by Turk
I would be interested in studies on birth order's impact on personality. In the assorted Turk clans and those of many friends, the oldest child tends to be mature, responsible, and emulates the parents in many ways. The next child needs to get out of the shadow of the first, and so branches out into different areas of interest or behavior, often pushing the edge of the behavioral envelope to uncomfortable limits. The youngest child (of 3 or more) winds up being completely unsupervised and could get away with murder, most likely because the parents have either given up or or have learned to dial back on the hovering.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 7:35 pm
by wilson
Turk wrote:I would be interested in studies on birth order's impact on personality. In the assorted Turk clans and those of many friends, the oldest child tends to be mature, responsible, and emulates the parents in many ways. The next child needs to get out of the shadow of the first, and so branches out into different areas of interest or behavior, often pushing the edge of the behavioral envelope to uncomfortable limits. The youngest child (of 3 or more) winds up being completely unsupervised and could get away with murder, most likely because the parents have either given up or or have learned to dial back on the hovering.
We've made similar observations, but expressed them differently. I'm the more contemplative, cerebral one, while my brother is more gruff and "typically male" in his social, emotional, etc. carriage. No idea what that means. We do get asked pretty regularly, though, how much older I am. I couldn't care less, but it drives him up the wall.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 7:48 pm
by Sue71
wilson wrote:
cl15876 wrote: I can relate, brother! I have a sister who loves to tell me what I should be doing!!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) but I still love her when I know she knows how to read between the lines!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) and then she still loves me!!! :-o :-o :-o :D
Every time my brother does this, he prefaces his statement(s) with "May I make a suggestion?", followed by his not-so-subtly snide way of indicating that he believes his manner of doing things to be vastly superior to mine.
I'm always tempted to respond with, "May I make an observation?...I'm a grown ass man."
Um, so I haven't posted much lately, but did you mean to hyphenate that so it reads a little, um differently? As in, grown-ass man? :-*

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 7:52 pm
by wilson
Sue71 wrote:
wilson wrote:
cl15876 wrote: I can relate, brother! I have a sister who loves to tell me what I should be doing!!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) but I still love her when I know she knows how to read between the lines!!! =)) =)) =)) =)) and then she still loves me!!! :-o :-o :-o :D
Every time my brother does this, he prefaces his statement(s) with "May I make a suggestion?", followed by his not-so-subtly snide way of indicating that he believes his manner of doing things to be vastly superior to mine.
I'm always tempted to respond with, "May I make an observation?...I'm a grown ass man."
Um, so I haven't posted much lately, but did you mean to hyphenate that so it reads a little, um differently? As in, grown-ass man? :-*
Well, I'm really more of a...well, nevermind. ;)

Perhaps I should have hyphenated. But yes, I am a grown-ass man, and not so much of a grown [pause] ass man.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 8:42 pm
by CathyCA
Turk wrote:I would be interested in studies on birth order's impact on personality. In the assorted Turk clans and those of many friends, the oldest child tends to be mature, responsible, and emulates the parents in many ways. The next child needs to get out of the shadow of the first, and so branches out into different areas of interest or behavior, often pushing the edge of the behavioral envelope to uncomfortable limits. The youngest child (of 3 or more) winds up being completely unsupervised and could get away with murder, most likely because the parents have either given up or or have learned to dial back on the hovering.
Do you know me and my 2 brothers?

I'm the oldest--the mature, responsible one. The middle child is the one who always tried to get attention--look at me, he was always saying, and thus he became the politician, becoming the president of the student body of every school he ever attended. The youngest got away with all kinds of bad behavior--presumably because our parents were watching me, thinking that I was the one getting in to trouble. The youngest STILL gets away with bad behavior.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 10:03 pm
by YmoBeThere
My sister and I are very different. For example, she's not nearly the PW I am.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 10:25 pm
by devildeac
YmoBeThere wrote:My sister and I are very different. For example, she's not nearly the PW I am.
Invite her to join us here, we'll teach her proper PWing... :))

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 5th, 2009, 11:07 pm
by Rolvix
My sister would probably be a better PW than me. :(

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 6th, 2009, 2:29 am
by Turk
CathyCA wrote:Do you know me and my 2 brothers?

I'm the oldest--the mature, responsible one. The middle child is the one who always tried to get attention--look at me, he was always saying, and thus he became the politician, becoming the president of the student body of every school he ever attended. The youngest got away with all kinds of bad behavior--presumably because our parents were watching me, thinking that I was the one getting in to trouble. The youngest STILL gets away with bad behavior.
I bet you can find more examples. Here's a story from way back in the day. As the eldest, I was first to fly the roost and try to make my way in the world. One day, I called home to check in. Little Sister Turk was still in high school, and I learn that she stayed out so late on Saturday night that she came home AFTER Mama and Papa Turk left for church on Sunday morning. So I asked Papa Turk, "You killed her, right? When's the funeral? I guess I'll need to get time off from work." And Papa Turk said something like, "Oh, she was out with her friends. We knew where she was." And I held the phone away from my ear to give my head more room to explode. To this day, I am convinced that if I had the huevos to pull such a stunt, I would have been chopped up into pieces and fed to the catfish in the Mon, Allegheny, and Ohio rivers (and probably the Yough too for good measure)....

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 6th, 2009, 2:59 am
by DevilAlumna
I'm the 2nd/youngest of two, but for the longest time, I was by far the more responsible, mature one. My bro was such a general screw-up through high school and 8 years afterwards, that I could pretty much do ANYTHING I wanted, and it would still be tame in comparison. That said, i was just a pretty easy-going kid, so I never really pushed any boundaries. I saw what happened when you screwed up, and I didn't want any of it.

Well, I went a bit crazy in college, but by then, I was technically an adult, and my parents were halfway around the world. :D :D

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 6th, 2009, 3:04 am
by Turk
DA, perhaps an indirect proof, no? Your big bro set the direction, and you figured out "I need to go the other way."

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 6th, 2009, 7:58 am
by Bostondevil
I'm a very responsible middle-child. The middle child tendancy I express in spades is diplomacy. I'm the daughter of two oldest children and I married and oldest child, I get bossed around a lot. And by a lot, I mean A LOT! Being the only daughter changes some of the dynamic. I've read the book too. The reason I display some oldest child traits is probably because I'm the first (and only) girl. My mother focused on me while my father focused on my older brother. My younger brother could have gotten away with murder but he didn't want too.

Re: Sibling differences

Posted: August 6th, 2009, 8:00 am
by weezie
Yah, well, it's all fun and games until you interject the spouses of siblings into the mix....then it kind of blows all to hellandgone. :(