crazietalk.net

...in the service against wicked snakes.
At the back door of our house, is an open vestibule type entry off a deck. On a side of the entry, hanging from the overhang, is a birdhouse which presently contains 3 baby wrens. (this will take a while...bear with me)
Last night, we had an unwanted visitor, a HUNGRY visitor. Visitor is otherwise known to animal lovers as: Mr. Squiggly; Serpent Bastard; Fast Son-of-a-Bitch; 6 Foot Black Snake. He/She?, I didn't ask, was intent on a poultry light-night dinner. The aforementioned squab. It's first appearance was right after dark, nine-ish. I stepped out back for a bit of air. There it was. A stick handy, I shoo-ed it away. Twenty minutes later, it's baaack. Still hungry. Again I sent it away.

The family, having been notified, was relaxed until the First Mate decided it would be cool to check it out. As she opened the door, Squiggly fell on her head and shoulders and then proceeded to crawl in though onto the back porch as it landed on the floor. He found an opening in the wall, behind the water heater and thought that would be a cool place to hang out. We used a wire to try and reach around to entice it to move out. This proved successful after about 20 minutes...successful to a point only of having it curl under the heater. No complaints. This put our removal efforts at an advantage.

With the wire coat-hanger now re-adjusted to hook the beast and try a sliding out maneuver, the Mate was wearing the gloves, said serpent was pulled out in the open. I had one of these useless trigger squeeze grabber thingies and vainly attempted to secure the animal. It's escape efforts found it crawling away between tha washer and dryer. The Mate, again the one with the gloves on, grabbed Squiggles by the tail and forcefully pulled it out of it's escape route. Stepping gingerly and backward out the door, onto the deck, the critter was dumped into a large black plastic trash bag and the top was quickly tied shut.

I drove five miles away, out in the country, not near other homes, and deposited it in the weeds, free and able to roam.

I performed like a scared little rabbit.

I had been drinking.
It was dark.
It was late.
I have a cold.
She was wearing the gloves.


Did I mention I had been drinking?

Are the baby wrens okay?

Daddy Galore is a pro at killing snakes. Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement. Dad Galore plays classical music at night to keep the slithering creatures away, which usually works. And if they do get too close, he has no problems killing them.

TillyGalore wrote:Are the baby wrens okay?

Daddy Galore is a pro at killing snakes. Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement. Dad Galore plays classical music at night to keep the slithering creatures away, which usually works. And if they do get too close, he has no problems killing them.

My mudda has also killed her share of snakes over the years...usually a shovel to the neckular region (not that snakes have necks...) by way of decapitation.
She's a pretty tough customer, that Mom.

TillyGalore wrote:Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement.

Pardon?

Sue71 wrote:

TillyGalore wrote:Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement.

Pardon?

The snakes are unwanted, I can assure you. It has to do with the way the house was constructed. Over the years my father has grown more and more unimpressed with the house, though has made numerous changes to the house. His next project includes shoring up the basement so the snakes don't get in. I don't think he has seen any snakes on the upper levels.

wilson wrote:

TillyGalore wrote:Are the baby wrens okay?

Daddy Galore is a pro at killing snakes. Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement. Dad Galore plays classical music at night to keep the slithering creatures away, which usually works. And if they do get too close, he has no problems killing them.

My mudda has also killed her share of snakes over the years...usually a shovel to the neckular region (not that snakes have necks...) by way of decapitation.
She's a pretty tough customer, that Mom.

Wow! Your mother is a better woman than I. I'll kill bugs when I'm home alone, but when K68 is there it becomes his job to kill the bugs.

TillyGalore wrote: Wow! Your mother is a better woman than I. I'll kill bugs when I'm home alone, but when K68 is there it becomes his job to kill the bugs.

Well, Mom is by herself at home now, and even when she and Dad were still together, I'm not sure how much help he really would have been. Bless his heart, "tough" is not the first adjective that comes to mind when thinking of my father. :roll:

wilson wrote:

TillyGalore wrote: Daddy Galore is a pro at killing snakes. Mom and Dad Galore have snakes in their basement. Dad Galore plays classical music at night to keep the slithering creatures away, which usually works. And if they do get too close, he has no problems killing them.

My mudda has also killed her share of snakes over the years...usually a shovel to the neckular region (not that snakes have necks...) by way of decapitation.
She's a pretty tough customer, that Mom.

There are some mighty brave women around here if they'll mess with snakes, even nonpoisonous ones. My wife and daughter would leave me to take care of one all by my lonesome. Did I tell you about the time I opened the back door to let the dog out, and curled up between the storm door and the one I just opened was a 18 footer? OK, it was only 3 feet long, but still...

As she opened the door, Squiggly fell on her head and shoulders

And THAT is when I would have passed out! Your wife is so brave!

I once had a California King Snake appear on my back deck--I was sitting in the den at my computer with the slider screen open. I heard a rustling, but knew that it couldn't be leaves--glanced over and saw a 5 foot snake.

I grabbed the fireplace poker and hit him. He coiled up and hissed at me and then slithered away. I went screaming out of the front door of the house and summoned one of the neighbors who lived down the street. He convinced me that I should have left the snake alone because the snake ate the gophers who routinely swam in my pool and clogged up my pool filters.

I hate snakes.

A list of animals I saw in my back yard when I lived in that house: king snake, tarantulas, aforementioned gophers, deer, coyotes, wild turkeys, the neighbor's pet bunny rabbit, owls, cows, horses, cowboys (on the trail behind the house), neighbors' cat, lizards, squirrels, birds.

I'd like to thank you very much for doing the right thing and letting it go out of harm's way. As an avid herp person, (and proud honor of two boas) I cringe when I hear stories of how the mighty killer black snake has been given it's due.
When I lived in the mountains, I had a large collection of snakes (20+ at one point) and it was pretty common that one of them would be crawling around escaped; sometimes we knew it was out, sometimes we didn't. My favorite was when some friends and I were watching tv, and behind the set a 6' black snake began making it's way up the wall looking for something to cling to. My friend (who didn't know about the snakes) said "damn, there's a snake on the wall!" to which I responded "oh, that's where it went!". He did eventually come back over, but only if I could guarantee him I knew where all of my reptiles were.

Follow up to the above story and thanks; if you find a poisonous snake in your yard, please let it be, or if you can't do that call animal control. Hopefully they'll have someone who will agree to remove it. I've removed several copperheads out my yards in the past for the safety of my nosey dogs and cats. I've only seen a couple rattlesnakes in the wild, but I was in their domain so I let them be. By the way, neither of them made a noise; I almost stepped on the first one, and it never flinched. It had obviously just shed, and was beautifully striped with bright yellow bands. (It was a canebrake rattler, eastern NC).
(not the photos I took)
I didn't notice it until literally the last step, it was so well camouflaged. I was even looking for them, the sole purpose of my hike was to find snakes. (I even told my stepdad at the time, I'm going snake hunting, this place feels snakey.) It saw me though, and never did rattle it. I took a couple pictures and went back the same way I came.

I use my dad's Vietnam War machete for dealing with snakes. My dad and wife are both terrified of them, though. I'll usually let the slithery suckers live, but if either of them sees one, I'm pressed into service, and only death will calm my poor relatives. I usually apologize to the poor critter, and I always try to get it in one whack.

If I'm at home and don't have the machete, I'll use a shovel or my zatoichi.

captmojo wrote:As she opened the door, Squiggly fell on her head and shoulders...

And if that were me, you could complete the sentence thusly: "...and her blood-curdling scream was heard throughout the subdivision before she passed out from sheer fright." I'm with CathyCA on this one!

Though I'm also with CB&B on this one...ensure the legless creature is returned to the exterior of the structure. Said legless creature is probably going to find and consume smaller, four-legged furry creatures who are even less wanted in my abode. I loved my pet rats and gerbils -- but they were invited. It's the uninvited critters (furry or not) that make my skin crawl.

As a Girl Scout leader, I'm not allowed to completely lose it, because if one loses it in front of 21 middle school girls, guess what happens. Chaos ensues. So, I'll calmly point out that, "We have a visitor! Fred is in the rafters!" Then point to the 4' long black snake in the shelter, move to the farthest possible location, and instruct the girls to let me know where our new friend is. They'll do a TERRIFIC job of letting me know if it comes towards me, yet I can continue a valiant attempt to set a positive role model for the girls. Yeah, that's it...

On the last day of school, I was helping out in the band room. One of the senior girls suddenly, in a single motion, goes from sitting on her chair to standing on it, pointing to the floor, and shrieking, "SNAKE!" Of the 75 kids in the class, four girls jump on their chair, another 4-6 bolt for the door, and the remainder rush over to see what's happening. Having just gotten a new camera, I took a picture of it. (This doesn't like my IMG link, so I'll just leave it as a URL: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=7 ... =623805602) I then sat back and watched while a future Eagle Scout got a towel, threw it over the snake (who probably did not understand all the commotion and sincerely regretted putting himself in that position), then took the poor creature outside and released him. I'm now more afraid of why the snake was in the band room -- just what would lure a snake in there? ***shudder***

The First Mate is an exceptional woman. My hat is off to her!

I hate snakes. I hate snakes. Fuck me, do I ever hate snakes.

colchar wrote:I hate snakes. I hate snakes. Fuck me, do I ever hate snakes.

Colchar's post is an example of why I love CTN.

As I read the Captain's post about the First Mate, all I could think of was: THIS is the woman who insists on 13 pillows on the bed? ;)

FWIW, we have no poisonous snakes in Madagascar They eat rats. Snakes are our friends.

Lavabe wrote:

colchar wrote:I hate snakes. I hate snakes. Fuck me, do I ever hate snakes.

Colchar's post is an example of why I love CTN.

As I read the Captain's post about the First Mate, all I could think of was: THIS is the woman who insists on 13 pillows on the bed? ;)

FWIW, we have no poisonous snakes in Madagascar They eat rats. Snakes are our friends.

I think anyone who has no fear of 13 pillows on the bed, is rightfully able to control their fears of serpentage. ? (new word alert)

CameronBornAndBred wrote:Follow up to the above story and thanks; if you find a poisonous snake in your yard, please let it be, or if you can't do that call animal control. Hopefully they'll have someone who will agree to remove it. I've removed several copperheads out my yards in the past for the safety of my nosey dogs and cats.

We have dealt with this issue in the past. The presence of Black snakes is believed to discourage the presence of all others. They are pretty territorial.

TillyGalore wrote:Are the baby wrens okay?

So far, so good. All accounted for. No snake troubles as yet, tonight.

devil84 wrote:I took a picture of it. (This doesn't like my IMG link, so I'll just leave it as a URL: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=7 ... =623805602)
I'm now more afraid of why the snake was in the band room -- just what would lure a snake in there? ***shudder***

Your snake looks just like the music stand, or whatever it is, that is "visually" right next to the snake. Same color, same shape, same diameter. Obviously the snake was looking for a family member :lol:

There are many places on, or just off, a golf course that I will not look for an errant golf ball. Don't want to run into any "friends with no shoulders". That is why they sell them (golf balls) in 3-packs and by the dozen.

OZZIE4DUKE wrote:

devil84 wrote:I took a picture of it. (This doesn't like my IMG link, so I'll just leave it as a URL: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=7 ... =623805602)
I'm now more afraid of why the snake was in the band room -- just what would lure a snake in there? ***shudder***

Your snake looks just like the music stand, or whatever it is, that is "visually" right next to the snake. Same color, same shape, same diameter. Obviously the snake was looking for a family member :lol:

That contraption to the side is a part of a floor tom (drum). And no, I'm not fond of snakes thinking drums stands are family members. There are too many drum stands in my house! Great...now I'll be thinking about snakes and the drum kit. ***ewww***