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If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 17th, 2009, 8:36 pm
by EarlJam
In Football?

In Baseball?

In Basketball?

For example: Football (an actual Colt goes up against an actual Jaguar). It doesn't have to be a football contest, just a brawl in general. I'm not yet sure who would win in each sport, but I can list a few teams I know most certainly would NOT win:

Baseball - a red sock or a white sock.

Football - a cardinal

Basketball - Some thunder

-EarlJam

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 17th, 2009, 8:41 pm
by CameronBornAndBred
Ummm..The Blue Devil. He has a wrought iron pitchfork. And it's real. And heavy. And sharp. And he can surf. And do backflips.

Next question.

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 18th, 2009, 5:25 am
by bjornolf
That would be a really tough one. Probably depend on the schedule. My initial thought was one of the Devil ones, as it would be pretty hard to beat a devil. However, if they came up against a team like Providence with their mascot, a few prayers and some holy water would vanquish them pretty fast.

Then I thought of the Spartans, with their armor and sword and shield. However, if they came up against the Cowboys of OK State, they'd be done. One shot from a revolver and it's over. Same for the Trojans. It's an interesting conundrum.

If we're talking pro sports, it would be pretty hard to beat the Titans or the Giants in the NFL. Of course, Zeus took out the Titans with his lightning bolt, so the Chargers might be able to take them. However, the Texans would argue that nobody can beat them. ;)

In basketball, it's be hard to go against the Wizards or the Suns. Throw pretty much anybody at the Sun and it's over pretty fast.

In baseball, it'd be pretty hard to go against the Angels or the Giants. If you're talking the avenging angels of the bible, they could pretty much take anybody. Although if the Texas Rangers' mascot was Mr. Chuck Norris as Walker, I'd probably have to go with them. Who beats Chuck? Too bad Ditka ain't a mascot!

In hockey, it'd be pretty hard to go against the Sharks, the Predators (especially if we pick the ones from the scifi movies!), or the Lightning. The Penguins might win on pure cuteness. Although, in the end, I think I'd have to go with the Senators. Those guys have been fucking people over for millenia. And making them like it!


%%-

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 18th, 2009, 2:40 pm
by Jesus_hurley
bjornolf wrote:That would be a really tough one. Probably depend on the schedule. My initial thought was one of the Devil ones, as it would be pretty hard to beat a devil. However, if they came up against a team like Providence with their mascot, a few prayers and some holy water would vanquish them pretty fast.
What about a Demon Deacon?

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 19th, 2009, 12:46 am
by devildeac
All I know is that the Trojans would pound the Beavers...

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 19th, 2009, 12:52 am
by cl15876
devildeac wrote:All I know is that the Trojans would pound the Beavers...
:-o :-o :-o :-o :-o :-o :-o

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 19th, 2009, 1:03 am
by EarlJam
devildeac wrote:All I know is that the Trojans would pound the Beavers...
yy

Fantastic!

Post of the week honors go to DevilDeac!

-EarlyJamnastica

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 19th, 2009, 7:50 am
by YmoBeThere
Jesus_hurley wrote:
bjornolf wrote:That would be a really tough one. Probably depend on the schedule. My initial thought was one of the Devil ones, as it would be pretty hard to beat a devil. However, if they came up against a team like Providence with their mascot, a few prayers and some holy water would vanquish them pretty fast.
What about a Demon Deacon?


What would the Deacon do preach someone to death?

Re: If Mascots were Real, Who would win the Championships?

Posted: December 23rd, 2009, 6:15 pm
by Rolvix
I'm leaning to the Tulsa Golden Hurricans (or the NC 'canes for that matter)...

Unless you threw in the San Diego State Aztecs!!! Heck, an entire civilization!