crazietalk.net

Tonight my roommate's Mom was on the phone flipping out about their stupid relatives from Louisiana who are going to be visiting for Christmas. It seems that during a phone conversation tonight an aunt asked how much toilet paper they wanted them to bring with them. Nancy was like "Pardon?!?" and the aunt explained that they had heard that there was a shortage of toilet paper up here in Canada so not to worry, they were bringing their own but also wanted to know how much they should bring up to leave with the family. Nancy explained, probably not too (she can freak out with the best of them) that there is no such shortage up here, there never has been, and that our forestry industry is one of, if not the, biggest in the world so how did they think we could possibly ever have such a shortage.

We all got a laugh out of how dumb these relatives are (I've heard some other stories about them and trust me, these people probably can't walk and chew gum at the same time) but it also got me to wondering - what myths about Canada have y'all heard down there? I'm not talking about jokes or giving you the opportunity to pull my leg, I'm asking about real myths/misconceptions about Canada. I know the people here are too worldly to believe in any stupid myths but I'm sure you've probably heard some and I was curious as to what they were. Plus I'm bored and can't be bothered calculating and entering tutorial grades from this semester so I need some entertainment.

Well the current one going around is that you have to wait six months to see a doctor.....

DukeUsul wrote:Well the current one going around is that you have to wait six months to see a doctor.....

That one is as outlandish as the toilet paper one.

I can see Canada from my house. ;)

Canadian consumers are treated unfairly by corporations despite the Canadian dollar being damned near at par with the US dollar.

Miles wrote:Canadian consumers are treated unfairly by corporations despite the Canadian dollar being damned near at par with the US dollar.

Well played.

Myths About Canada?

Bob and Doug

Lavabe wrote:Myths About Canada?

Bob and Doug

Hosers.

CameronBornAndBred wrote:

Lavabe wrote:Myths About Canada?

Bob and Doug

Hosers.

Santa Claus is a "Ho-ho-hoser".

In my American history class, Dr. Durden would always ask Danny Meagher to "give us the Canadian perspective on this issue."



I guess you kinda sorta had to be there to appreciate the humor. . .

My Toronto relatives always spoke poorly about people from Newfoundland - "Newfie's". Supposedly, they aren't the brightest bulbs in the pack.

colchar wrote:

Miles wrote:Canadian consumers are treated unfairly by corporations despite the Canadian dollar being damned near at par with the US dollar.

Well played.

In all seriousness, it sucks to be in that position and I totally feel for you. Until the population increases in Canada though, they just won't see the price breaks you get from large distribution. I thought NAFTA was supposed to help this a bit, but who knows how that ended up. In the meantime, lemme know if you need help with large purchases.

Hey, here's a question: what about ebay? Do you have to pay any outrageous fees on ebay?

Miles wrote:

colchar wrote:

Miles wrote:Canadian consumers are treated unfairly by corporations despite the Canadian dollar being damned near at par with the US dollar.

Well played.

In all seriousness, it sucks to be in that position and I totally feel for you. Until the population increases in Canada though, they just won't see the price breaks you get from large distribution. I thought NAFTA was supposed to help this a bit, but who knows how that ended up. In the meantime, lemme know if you need help with large purchases.

Hey, here's a question: what about ebay? Do you have to pay any outrageous fees on ebay?

I have an eBay in Canada story:

When I lived in the hotel in Campbell, California, my eBay account got hacked. Someone used my account to buy an orange wig from a seller in China. I called the eBay help line, and volunteered to WALK the three blocks over to the eBay headquarters to deliver the proof that I was teaching school--and nowhere near a computer--when my account got hacked.

"Oh, you can't do that," the helpful person said.

"Why not?" I asked.

Because I'm in Vancouver.

She ended up restoring my account and deleting that seller/hacker from the eBay community.

We chatted some more, and I learned that she'd never even seen the eBay headquarters in San Jose.

I don't know if these are myths or not but here are some things I believe about Canada.

It's cold.
Canadians speak French.
It's still cold in May.
Canadians love ice fishing and curling.
It's really, really, mind-numbingly cold.
Canadians love beer.
The hookers in Montreal wear parkas.
If you are wearing a parka in certain parts of Montreal, people will think you're a hooker.
You can get really great desserts at the tea houses in Montreal (I know that one is not a myth.)
You can get really great tea there too.
If you visit Montreal for the first time starting in May and you've just come from North Carolina where you've lived all your life, it's really, really, really, fucking cold.

OZZIE4DUKE wrote:My Toronto relatives always spoke poorly about people from Newfoundland - "Newfie's". Supposedly, they aren't the brightest bulbs in the pack.

That isn't a myth.

Miles wrote:

colchar wrote:

Miles wrote:Canadian consumers are treated unfairly by corporations despite the Canadian dollar being damned near at par with the US dollar.

Well played.

In all seriousness, it sucks to be in that position and I totally feel for you. Until the population increases in Canada though, they just won't see the price breaks you get from large distribution. I thought NAFTA was supposed to help this a bit, but who knows how that ended up. In the meantime, lemme know if you need help with large purchases.

Hey, here's a question: what about ebay? Do you have to pay any outrageous fees on ebay?

Yeah, the shipping fees on ebay are usually outrageous.

I contacted the company (Musician's Friend) about the amp last night and it seems that their free shipping offer would apply to this order. Their website says it doesn't but then starts talking about customs duties etc. so I assumed that they charged for shipping and that I would also be on the hook for customs duties. However, the girl I spoke to entered the order on their system and no shipping cost came up so it seems that when they say shipping to Canada isn't free they are actually just pointing out that we may be nailed for fees by other parties (eg. Canada Customs). Now I just have to talk to an old friend of mine who was a customs broker for years to find out how much I am likely to be dinged at the border (my brother orders stuff from outside the country all the time and only gets dinged about 50% of the time) or whether she could help 'massage' my shipment through the process for me. I also need to find out which method they would use to ship here as UPS charges ridiculous 'broker' fees to get things across the border (I say ridiculous because they are high and, also, because Canada Customs has a program set up under which they don't charge courier companies for shipments worth less than $1600 so UPS might be charging when they didn't have to pay anything themselves). If they ship using a service other than UPS and it works out to be enough of a deal I'll probably order it from the States rather than buying locally.

CathyCA wrote: I have an eBay in Canada story:

When I lived in the hotel in Campbell, California, my eBay account got hacked. Someone used my account to buy an orange wig from a seller in China. I called the eBay help line, and volunteered to WALK the three blocks over to the eBay headquarters to deliver the proof that I was teaching school--and nowhere near a computer--when my account got hacked.

"Oh, you can't do that," the helpful person said.

"Why not?" I asked.

Because I'm in Vancouver.

She ended up restoring my account and deleting that seller/hacker from the eBay community.

We chatted some more, and I learned that she'd never even seen the eBay headquarters in San Jose.

My mother regularly orders from Sears Canada and could get someone on the phone from any of their call centers across the country. She called to order something two weeks ago and found out that the person she was talking to was in the Philippines. She then discovered that Sears had closed all of their call centres and moved them overseas. She promptly cut up her Sears card and sent it back to them with a nasty letter explaining why a loyal customer for the last 35 years would no longer be shopping with them (she spent a lot there each year but I doubt they'll care).

colchar wrote:

CathyCA wrote: I have an eBay in Canada story:

When I lived in the hotel in Campbell, California, my eBay account got hacked. Someone used my account to buy an orange wig from a seller in China. I called the eBay help line, and volunteered to WALK the three blocks over to the eBay headquarters to deliver the proof that I was teaching school--and nowhere near a computer--when my account got hacked.

"Oh, you can't do that," the helpful person said.

"Why not?" I asked.

Because I'm in Vancouver.

She ended up restoring my account and deleting that seller/hacker from the eBay community.

We chatted some more, and I learned that she'd never even seen the eBay headquarters in San Jose.

My mother regularly orders from Sears Canada and could get someone on the phone from any of their call centers across the country. She called to order something two weeks ago and found out that the person she was talking to was in the Philippines. She then discovered that Sears had closed all of their call centres and moved them overseas. She promptly cut up her Sears card and sent it back to them with a nasty letter explaining why a loyal customer for the last 35 years would no longer be shopping with them (she spent a lot there each year but I doubt they'll care).

They probably won't care. Many, many, many moons ago, when I was a child, our family moved from the States to Tokyo. At some point, there many purchases from Sears. They sent the bill to my Dad via sea mail. They sent the collection notices air mail. It was many years before he would shop at Sears again - and he let them know why.

I don't know that I know any myths about Canada. I hear there are some great people there - especially those working on a PhD in history. ;)

Bostondevil wrote:I don't know if these are myths or not but here are some things I believe about Canada.

It's cold.

Only during winter (length varies across the country but where I am we got our first light dusting of snow yesterday but it was still warm enough for me to go out around midnight wearing just a sweatshirt without a jacket). Even during winter we get some warm spells during which almost all of the snow will melt so A) it isn't that cold to begin with and B) that cold doesn't always last. Actually, I'd say our winters aren't much worse than those in Boston. Parts of New York, especially around Buffalo, have it way way worse than we do. Shit, we're almost tropical compared to Buffalo. And Detroit is right across the river from Windsor Ontario so their climates would be identical. If you don't think Detroit's weather is bad our is just the same.

Canadians speak French.

No we don't. I certainly don't (and never ever ever ever will) and neither do any of my friends. Technically both English and French are our official languages but the reality is quite different. Only 22% of Canadian list French as their mother tongue and the overwhelming majority of them live in Quebec. In all other provinces the number is likely less than 5% (4.4% here in Ontario).

It's still cold in May.

Maybe waaaay up north (eg. next to Alaska) but not in the rest of the country. Where I live I'll be in shorts in April. Then again, as soon as it hits five degrees celcius some people start wearing shorts.

Canadians love ice fishing and curling.

Only a small percentage do. I haven't fished since I was a kid and I've certainly never been ice fishing. I hate the winter and won't go out unless I absolutely have to so I'm certainly not ever going to go ice fishing. Even the majority of those who do only use it as an excuse to get away from the wife and get drunk. As for curling, it is only played by a small percentage of the population. I've played and I love it - I absolutely love it. But that is far from common (we're one of the most multicultural countries in the world and it would only be a small percentage of those people who would be into curling - primarily those who are descended from certain European countries).

It's really, really, mind-numbingly cold.

Again, waaaay up north it is, and some places out west are like that at times (do not ever go to Winnipeg and certainly do not even dream of going there in February), but the rest of the country isn't that cold during winter (and that only lasts from December to April).

Canadians love beer.

We do. And we drink real beer.

The hookers in Montreal wear parkas.

Hah, hah. And why would they? The majority are originally from Russia so our could is nothing to them.

If you are wearing a parka in certain parts of Montreal, people will think you're a hooker.

Very funny.

You can get really great desserts at the tea houses in Montreal (I know that one is not a myth.)
You can get really great tea there too.

I wouldn't know as I refuse to go to Montreal because it is in Quebec.

If you visit Montreal for the first time starting in May and you've just come from North Carolina where you've lived all your life, it's really, really, really, fucking cold.

It isn't even close to being cold there in May as the average temperature is 66 degrees fahrenheit.

[quote="DukieInKansas"
I don't know that I know any myths about Canada. I hear there are some great people there - especially those working on a PhD in history. ;)[/quote]


That is the biggest myth of all!!!