crazietalk.net

Sue71 wrote:

bjornolf wrote:
As for the water molecules, not only does adding a splash of water to, say, rice under the wet paper towel help it cook faster, but it also cooks more evenly cause you get the steaming action of the water vaporizing and getting trapped under the paper towel. Definitely yummier that way.

Engineers.

I hope that wasn't directed at me, if so I'm insulted. I studied physics. It is THE science. The science of science. Although, I guess it's kinda like engineering, just much, much, much less useful at getting a job...... :lol:

Sue71 wrote:1. You love me.
2. Welcome to 2009.
3. Liar. Easy to put something like that in print when you don't have to back it up.

1. And you love me.
2. I have never burned my reheated brisket and potatoes. NEVER.
3. No, I'm not lying. I owe you Fogo de Chao, but that ain't happening any time soon so I was going to offer a trade.
4. I like pirates.

Miles wrote:....
4. I like pirates.

If you have ever seen two and 1/2 men, and need a Colonoscopy, I think you might change your mind!

Sue71 wrote:

bjornolf wrote:
As for the water molecules, not only does adding a splash of water to, say, rice under the wet paper towel help it cook faster, but it also cooks more evenly cause you get the steaming action of the water vaporizing and getting trapped under the paper towel. Definitely yummier that way.

Engineers.

Hey, what's wrong with us?

Did you ever hear the one about the engineer that went to hell when he died? If not, I'll post it. it is NOT dirty, but it is pretty funny.

Miles wrote: 1. And you love me.
2. I have never burned my reheated brisket and potatoes. NEVER.
3. No, I'm not lying. I owe you Fogo de Chao, but that ain't happening any time soon so I was going to offer a trade.
4. I like pirates.

OMG OMG OMG you just publicly admitted you owe me Fogo!!!

bjornolf wrote:
Did you ever hear the one about the engineer that went to hell when he died? If not, I'll post it. it is NOT dirty, but it is pretty funny.

Post away! Can't wait!

Sue71 wrote:

Miles wrote: 1. And you love me.
2. I have never burned my reheated brisket and potatoes. NEVER.
3. No, I'm not lying. I owe you Fogo de Chao, but that ain't happening any time soon so I was going to offer a trade.
4. I like pirates.

OMG OMG OMG you just publicly admitted you owe me Fogo!!!

I have admitted this before in public, you just have a selective memory.

A clown blowing a horn is your punishment.

I'm getting DukeUsel and Bjornwolf confused as they both have pictures of their respective daughters in Duke clothes.

cl15876 wrote:

Sue71 wrote: Engineers.

Where we would be in this world, if it wasn't for us!

Exactly!

TillyGalore wrote:I'm getting DukeUsel and Bjornwolf confused as they both have pictures of their respective daughters in Duke clothes.

Sorry. And there's not "w" in bjornolf. ;) My character in my book would be very offended. Don't make the vikings angry.

As for the joke about the engineer in hell...

An engineer dies and goes to hell. The devil calls him into his office and says "what am I going to do with you?"

The engineer explains that if the devil will go easy on him, he can make a lot of improvements. The devil agrees that he won't get tortured if he makes improvements. So, the engineer builds an air conditioner and installs elevators and escalators. He designs equipment to help the souls in their impossible tasks. He even makes automatic whips so the torturers' arms don't hurt.

When God comes down for his annual inspection, he's amazed. He calls the devil over and says "what the hell is going on here?"

The devil responds, "Ever since you sent us that engineer, things have been getting better and better. Soon, it'll be as nice down here as it is in heaven. Thanks!"
God gets angry, "What engineer? You weren't supposed to get an engineer down here! This is preposterous! Where is he? I'm taking him with me!"
The devil gets mad, "Oh no you're not. We've never been happier!"
So God says, "If you don't give me that engineer back RIGHT NOW, I'll sue!"

And the devil says...

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"Oh yeah, where are you gonna get the lawyer?" ;)

bjornolf wrote:.
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"Oh yeah, where are you gonna get the lawyer?" ;)

You are so going to regret putting the preceding paragraphs in this space.

Everybody beats up on lawyers all the time. "Hahahahahaha--they are so funny--let me tell you this joke. . ."

But guess what? Who do people call when they're scared and in trouble? Hint: they don't go call their engineers.

bjornolf wrote:.
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"Oh yeah, where are you gonna get the lawyer?" ;)

HAHAHAHA - I love it!!!!!! Very nice! Thanks for sharing!

CathyCA wrote:You are so going to regret putting the preceding paragraphs in this space.

Everybody beats up on lawyers all the time. "Hahahahahaha--they are so funny--let me tell you this joke. . ."

But guess what? Who do people call when they're scared and in trouble? Hint: they don't go call their engineers.

First of all, I have nothing but respect for many lawyers. Many of my best friends are lawyers. It was a lawyer that told me that joke. One that was an undergrad engineering student. I worked with lawyers all the time when I was a patent examiner at the USPTO.

However, there wouldn't be so many jokes about them if they didn't deserve to get tweaked once in a while. At least I didn't tell the ones about the lawyers at the bottom of the sea or the lawyers and the sharks.

And I never call a lawyer when I'm scared and in trouble. If my .45 or my fire extinguisher or my first aid kit can't help, I call 911.

CathyCA wrote:You are so going to regret putting the preceding paragraphs in this space.

Everybody beats up on lawyers all the time. "Hahahahahaha--they are so funny--let me tell you this joke. . ."

But guess what? Who do people call when they're scared and in trouble? Hint: they don't go call their engineers.

That's because engineers have already solved the problem before we knew it existed. ;)

cl15876 wrote:

bjornolf wrote:.
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"Oh yeah, where are you gonna get the lawyer?" ;)

HAHAHAHA - I love it!!!!!! Very nice! Thanks for sharing!

NO! You had better not love this joke.

I thought it was going to be the chemistry version of the joke, "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Explain your answer."

But we digress. Supper. I went to first unread so I can't remember if it was already mentioned, but it helps tremendously to put a cup of water in with bread when microwaving. Keeps it from drying out. (Is this topic-related at all?)

ArkieDukie wrote:I thought it was going to be the chemistry version of the joke, "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Explain your answer."

But we digress. Supper. I went to first unread so I can't remember if it was already mentioned, but it helps tremendously to put a cup of water in with bread when microwaving. Keeps it from drying out.

Great tip, make sense.

ArkieDukie wrote:(Is this topic-related at all?)

Like that has ever mattered.

Ahhhh, the world of microwave stories. When I was in 8th grade (mind you that was 4 years ago) it became the rage at my middle school to put cookies in the microwave. Now this was good if you put them in for about 30 seconds. Quite delicious if I may add. But there had to be that ONE kid who screwed over the rest of us. He put his cookie in for 30 minutes just as the last period of lunch was over. About 10 minutes later the fire alarm went off and as we walked past the cafeteria to go outside, green smoke was pouring out of said microwave. How did the smoke become green? I have no idea. The fire department came but someone had already put out the flaming cookie and I was just glad to be out of class for 15 minutes. And people hate middle school.....such good memories if you ask me.

Ben63 wrote:Ahhhh, the world of microwave stories. When I was in 8th grade (mind you that was 4 years ago) it became the rage at my middle school to put cookies in the microwave. Now this was good if you put them in for about 30 seconds. Quite delicious if I may add. But there had to be that ONE kid who screwed over the rest of us. He put his cookie in for 30 minutes just as the last period of lunch was over. About 10 minutes later the fire alarm went off and as we walked past the cafeteria to go outside, green smoke was pouring out of said microwave. How did the smoke become green? I have no idea. The fire department came but someone had already put out the flaming cookie and I was just glad to be out of class for 15 minutes. And people hate middle school.....such good memories if you ask me.

You gotta check out youtube for some cool videos on "stuff" being microwaved. Here are a few of my favorites:
Beer Bottle
Soap
Light Bulbs